6:28 am – Awake. Dream was good. Can’t remember, but woke up happy. Close eyes, fall asleep again.

8:11 am – Text from a bestie wakes me up. Yikes, it’s late! Must get up and take care of SDs. Especially as they refused to go outside and potty before bed last night. So much for getting up early to avoid the crowds at the grocery store. Sigh.

8:25 am – Text the Hubs to tell him Happy Birthday. Very conscientious about this as I haven’t lived down the year I forgot the day was his birthday. Apparently having pregnancy brain, morning sickness and a UTI is inexcusable. SDs fed. Scrambled egg in coconut oil for them again. Eggs definitely on grocery list for today.

9:00 am – Call Mom in law. Still doing family dinner, even though missing half of family. This is good. I don’t have to cook. We move up time frame for family dinner.

11:00 am – Showered, dressed, hit Starbucks for a Venti triple shot Mocha Frappucino. It’s 95 degrees out already. I need caffeine and sugar and I need it cold. To heck with eating right today. Head to grocery store. Definitely getting there later than I meant to. Could not light fire under my butt.Have Venti Mocha Frapp in hand, along with digital list and purse. Grab a buggy. Put Starbuck’s yummy-ness in cup holder on buggy. Start out in produce section. Get more Fredericksburg peaches, some nectarines and a salad kit. Get head of iceburg lettuce for BLT’s later this week. Must remember to ‘weave’ bacon into square before cooking. Head down next produce aisle and select avocados. Head to the section with tomatoes. This is where it all went to hell. All I have in my cart so far is produce. Oh, and the Starbuck’s cup.  Skinny woman with pinched face, decked out in her lycra work-out gear accosts me out of the blue. “You know, if you didn’t drink those, you could probably lose weight. Those things are nothing but sugar and fat and chemicals.” Look around, hoping she’s talking to someone she knows. Though store is busy, she is clearly talking to me. My right eyebrow shoots up, high on my forehead. This is not good. For her.  I think this is going to be more of ‘Suzanne Sugarbaker’ moment instead of a ‘Julia Sugarbaker’ moment as I gather my thoughts. Look at this lady and think, “This is it. This is why I will need bail money today and why the Hubs will have to settle for conjugal visits.” Smile sweetly, as if I’m considering her advice, then let loose. “Ma’am, I haven’t had more than 4 consecutive hours of sleep since my husband went out of town Monday. I’m tired. I’m cranky. And I haven’t got time for some do-gooder, controlling little asshole to tell me how she thinks I should live my life. Now, if you’ll pardon me, you can take your unsolicited advice and shove it where the sun doesn’t shine. I’m going to finish my grocery shopping. You can kiss my ass.” This is why I haven’t spent much time with the general public this week. Noticed people seemed to get out of my way a lot in the store today. I need to figure out how to turn down my ‘weirdo magnet’ because it’s clearly set to ‘strong.’ Remembered to get more eggs for SDs. Realize when I get home, I’d already bought eggs last Monday, just didn’t see in fridge. Sigh.

3:00 pm – Head out to Mom in law’s house. Stop and get gas. Still doing family dinner, even though half the family is missing. Nephew weenies out again. Had enjoyable dinner at Cracker Barrel, but should have stuck with chicken and dumplings as the chicken fried chicken was less than stellar. Better yet, should have gotten breakfast.

5:35 pm – On way home from family dinner. KOKE FM is playing Living on Tulsa Time –ugh! That was where the Hubs and Pops in law were potentially stopping for the night. Irony not lost on me.  I hate the song – heard it too much at the NCCC Convention in 2008 when it was, you guessed it, in Tulsa.  Change radio station. Land on Rick Astley’s Never Gonna Give You Up. Just effectively Rick Rolled myself. Again. Told the Hubs. He laughed. Bigger irony – they ended up staying in Joplin, MO.

6:00 pm – Change sheets on bed, and make it. Fold and put away minimal laundry. Realize did not accomplish any of my projects for this week. Oh well, this coming weekend is a 3 day holiday. I will celebrate our country’s independence by liberating a lot of crap in our house.

7:14 pm – Beyond time to feed pups. Chicken boiled, now boiling rice. Feed them kibble and chicken. Bowls and floor polished clean.

7:37 pm – Give SDs toys to play with.  SD2 wants SD1’s ball. SD1 wants her little purple dumbbell. They switch, only orange ball left on couch. SD2 performs feat which she has never done before – she jumps up onto couch all by herself.  Oh boy. This is not good. She does not need that kind of independence. Make mental note to keep couch cover on so her nails don’t ruin the leather. She keeps dropping ball off of couch. I keep getting it for her. Become aware that she has me well trained. Immediately stop getting ball for her. She can’t apparently get on couch with ball in her mouth. Watch her struggle. Laugh. Tell her it’s payback for making me get her ball. Over and over.

9:00 pm – Bedtime!! Force SDs outside to potty. They both look at me like I’m crazy. I may be. It’s been a long week. Put them up in their crates, give them treats, give them kisses. Go to put laundry in washer, see notice to “clean washer” so I put in tab and run it. Sigh. Wanted to get long running load going. Oh well.

9:30 pm – Face washed, teeth brushed, more laundry gathered.  Straighten up bedroom. Look under bed again for missing earring. Cannot vacuum until this earring is found. It’s been missing three weeks. Will use nylon over vacuum in the morning to see if I can find it that way. Bedroom must get vacuumed!

9:45 pm – Feeling sleepy, put on The Holiday, promptly fall asleep.

2:39 am – Almost five hours of sleep! FIVE!! Get up, go potty, fall back into bed, and sleep… The Hubs will be home this afternoon. Can. Not. Wait.